The essence of success to many is fulfilment. Sadly, the pursuit of success does not always end in the happily-ever-after. People realize their dreams but end up with feelings of dissatisfaction and emptiness. In order for success to meet with fulfilment, one’s goals must be aligned with their heart’s true desires and values.

Chase Your Own Dream

The world has a very subtle but power influence on the goals we choose to pursue. It is in the way it paints success; it is in the people we listen to or observe. Society generally defines success in terms of material wealth, social status, education, fame. Our goals are usually shaped, by friends, family, celebrities, but hardly by our innermost desires and values.

In reality, success is personal and can manifest in so many ways beyond what the external forces in our lives make us believe. True, it can be all of the above, but it is also the pure joy we feel in some of the ordinary things that we accomplish. Just ask a dedicated teacher, a committed nurse, a devoted parent or spouse. To each of them, performing their duties is a very satisfying accomplishment.

 Goals and Values

Let your dream match the thing(s) you believe in. Sometimes, societal pressures push us to take on challenges that violate our personal ethics. We trade our core beliefs to attain a goal just to realize that it was not worth it. Some of the problems facing humanity today are caused by people in positions of power, yet possessing no leadership attributes whatsoever.

There are a thousand ways of being successful. Choose one that makes room for real joy for you and other people. You can achieve it through your true calling. Let not others dictate your dream, and never confuse someone’s dream for yours. If you spend your life trying to live someone else’s fantasy, you will spend your life seeking an elusive happiness.

Your Challenge?

Visualising your success. Place yourself in a fantasy of your achievement, then assess your feelings. Are you at peace with yourself? Can you look  in the mirror each day with a smile on your face? Can you face the people you love? If you answer “yes” to all these questions, then go after your heart’s desire.

Build Upon Self-Awareness

A long-time friend of mine once asked me what I thought her talent was. As I struggled to answer this question I could feel that she had something else in mind, or at least, was hoping I would say something else. It was an awkward moment. I really did not have to answer that question. I should have just told her what I am about to tell you: Go figure it out!

Being aware of your personality and individuality is the foundation on which every aspect of your life rests — self-image, strengths, weaknesses, dreams and aspirations, relationships with other people and things. Taking a moment now and then to re-evaluate the person that you are will help put you back on your rightful course of life, and save you unnecessary hardship.

If you find yourself lost and turning in circles, perhaps it is time for some serious introspection. You may seek advice, but unless you are clear on what you want, you may not be able to distinguish between good and bad advice.

Here are some benefits of introspection:

  • Knowing the right choices to make
  • Feeling secure and steadfast in one’s decisions
  • Identifying and focusing on one’s life goals and how to reach them
  • Knowing who and what one needs and does not need in their life
  • Learning to trust one’s instincts and making bold decisions
  • Recognizing when to jump on opportunities, and when to hold back.
  • Not being overwhelmed by failure, but seeing it as a learning curve

You may not like what you see when you look inside. Acknowledge what you find and if you do not like what you see, redefine who you are and rewrite your story. This applies to your career, friendships, spiritual convictions, emotional situation, and just about anything. Do not be afraid to trust yourself.

“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”

— C.G Jung

My Resolution: More than just Words

My Resolution: More than just Words

Up to the last week of 2017, I could not decide on a New Year resolution. At some point I stopped trying and chose instead to reflect on past resolutions. Soon enough, I realized that I had not honored my previous commitments beyond the first 2 weeks of January. This revelation forced me to take a good look at the reasons for my failure, and here is what I learned:

  1. I never fully understood the reason I made a particular promise to myself.
  2. I failed to acknowledge the challenges of committing to my decision.
  3. I lacked a strong incentive to stay engaged.

If you can relate to the above situation, whether you are still figuring out your New Year resolution, or making plans to improve your behavior or lifestyle, consider these points:

  • Acknowledge that decisions are easy to make and hard to keep. They require adhering to new habits or breaking old ones. It is hard to kill old habits, but it is harder to consciously acquire good ones. Be conscious always that, embracing or letting go of habits takes time, effort, and patience.
  • Be fully aware of the circumstances surrounding your decision. A commitment may seem simple when you make it, but its execution may entail major changes and have far reaching effects; understanding it would  ensure physical and mental readiness.
  • Lay down a plan to succeed and ask yourself what it will take to honor your promise? Do you have a fear that is a major obstacle to your progress? You could challenge yourself to face it and move forward. Is there a bigger dream that your success will help you fulfil?

Applying yourself to anything is the only way you get it done. It is up to you to look for ways to make your desire so strong that backing out is not an option.

“Commitment is an act, not a word.”

— Jean Paul Sartre